What’s that on the tarmac?

All I wanted to was to not have to listen to power wheels running in the driveway tonight. So I had a bright idea to take the boys to the KC Aviation Center to watch ‘panes’ take off. I scored some dinner…that came with toys…(that was foreshadowing).

The boys were so excited. So excited that they chucked their spy toy discs (who was the genius who invented projectiles for kids meals?)  on the tarmac. THE TARMAC. Granted, the planes are tiny toothpicks with wings but still. That’s gotta be against FAA regs to have small, red plastic discs out there.  So ‘magically’, we watched the planes go to sleep and snuck out of there.  

Tomorrow, we are driving power wheels. Again.

Venus Schmenus

I should have known. I should have known that me taking a minute to sit outside on the deck snuggling with M and L would have ended with them yelling ‘Penis’ over and over…. 

It was my fault. I was avoiding (classic CM move) something I didn’t want to do so of course I find lots of things to distract me. Cooking, cleaning (cough, cough), sorting stamps and putting the grill cover back on. I NEVER put the grill cover back on. Or cook, I NEVER do that… well. 

But L asked for his ‘super favorite’ meal….chicken drumsticks on the grill, mashed potatoes and corn. So I obliged. It is the only thing (practically) that he asks me to make over and over. And because I know his standards are low now, I say yes every time.  But I digress….

Fred and Barney were walking around munching on their 3rd drumstick each. It makes my ego inflate for a half a second. I went outside to sit, put the grill cover on and jack around….and M followed me. We started talking about the moon. He was saying ‘hi Moon’ between mouthfuls. That boy has the Grandma Mildred Faddis talent of cleaning off a drumstick bone. It’s amazing. Like mouth agape amazing.

L joins us and takes a seat on my lap. He asked where the man in the sky is and I recover quickly *parenting error* and say ‘Oh, Venus? He is up there somewhere.’ Ignore the fact I took Mythology in college but let’s just assume I took that pass/fail.  L explains to me ‘yeah, Venus has the day off. He made dinner and then had to go to Target.  Teo, say hi to Venus’.  Wait for it….

M says ‘Hi Penis!’.  L looks at me for approval or disapproval and I cracked. I smiled and that was the ‘go for launch’ sign. Simultaneously, they start yelling ‘Hi, Penis!’.  I know my neighbors already hate me for the barking ball of fur we call a dog but now I have town criers who yell anatomy parts into the night? The value of my house just dropped by at least 5 bucks.  

So, beware, don’t ask M about the planets. Or just not Uranus.